Ecclesiastes 4:4 says, "Again, I considered all travail, and every right work, that for this a man is envied of his neighbour. This is also vanity and vexation of spirit." (KJV)
I just want to share some thoughts that came to me as I read this verse. This verse points out a truth that is part of our basic human nature. Do we look at the exciting things happening in the lives of others and automatically say, "Whoo hoo, good for that person! They work hard and deserve it!" Or do we automatically wonder, "What about me?" I believe our basic human inclination is to look at the situation of others and compare it to ourselves and how we are doing.
My son had a playmate at daycare who made me laugh a lot because she was a perfect example of this "what about me" mentality. If I told my son, "Let's go, we're having friends over tonight," this playmate would say (in a soulful 3 year old voice and huge puppy eyes), "I don't have friends coming over." If I told my son, "You've got your black rain boots on," this playmate would overhear and say, "I don't have black rain boots." These comments were hilarious to me, but it showed a problem we all have when we get stuck in our base nature.
We focus on what other people have and become jealous because we don't have the things we see.
Let me tell you, if you want a lesson on what's in our base nature, observe a toddler and they will teach you everything that we adults struggle with privately! Ecclesiastes 4:4 talks about how a person's hard work produces envy in other people. The writer here says this reaction reflects our vanity and reflects an unsatisfied spirit. As Christians we already know not to be jealous of the things other people have. However, sometimes those feelings still creep up. Our society, with our social media platforms, exacerbate the problem, as people use these tools to put out a glamorous front to the world. It makes it easier and easier to allow those questions of "What about me?" to creep up.
So what do we do about our basic jealous predisposition? When we have those feelings or thoughts, we should reflect and consider whether we are unsatisfied in some way. Do we have an unmet expectation? Don't focus on the person you see who has aroused those feelings. Instead, look inwardly to understand your feelings and go to God. Tell God about your desires.
Wanting a bigger house or designer clothes like so and so, are thoughts that can reflect jealousy. However, we can turn that around by going to God and allowing him to open our heart to understanding whether our desires are something we truly care about or are things we could live without. I believe the Holy Spirit can make that clear for us. When you realize - hey I don't really need this, you will no longer have a desire for it and you will not be jealous when you see people who have that thing. But, if you do feel a need for it, you are now in the right mindset to say why and talk to God about it. You can ask him to help you attain that goal. Remember God's word in Matthew 7:7-11 says:
For me, I don't want a huge house. However, I do want a home that is large enough to have more kids, be able to comfortably entertain friends and family, and allow for quiet spaces where we could individually enjoy reflective times without distracting each other. If that desire comes along with granite countertops- even better! (Just kidding!) Looking at my need/want, I can see that I already have some of that and more, and this perspective helps me to not have jealousy when I see how other people live around me.
It's important to note that changing our mindset, is not something that we can do on our own. It can only truly be done by the Holy Spirit. I've been reading the book of Ephesians and in there the Apostle Paul instructs Christians to "put off" their base nature and "put on" a new self which is created in the likeness of God. Paul tells us to be renewed in our minds and filled with the Holy Spirit so that we can live in unity and love and have peace with each other. (Ephesians 4) When our minds are renewed, our thoughts are renewed too. We can stop thinking, "What about me" when we look at the blessings of other people. We can allow ourselves to truly walk in love with the people around us because we are no longer inhibited by jealousy.
Let's do what Paul says and "put off" that base nature that likes to compare our haves and haves nots. Let's "put on" the new nature, which is us being filled with the Holy Spirit and talking to God directly when we feel the troubles of feeling unsatisfied. God wants good things for us and cares about our desires. He will do the work of aligning our desires to His will as long as we stay connected with him! Amen.
I just want to share some thoughts that came to me as I read this verse. This verse points out a truth that is part of our basic human nature. Do we look at the exciting things happening in the lives of others and automatically say, "Whoo hoo, good for that person! They work hard and deserve it!" Or do we automatically wonder, "What about me?" I believe our basic human inclination is to look at the situation of others and compare it to ourselves and how we are doing.
My son had a playmate at daycare who made me laugh a lot because she was a perfect example of this "what about me" mentality. If I told my son, "Let's go, we're having friends over tonight," this playmate would say (in a soulful 3 year old voice and huge puppy eyes), "I don't have friends coming over." If I told my son, "You've got your black rain boots on," this playmate would overhear and say, "I don't have black rain boots." These comments were hilarious to me, but it showed a problem we all have when we get stuck in our base nature.
We focus on what other people have and become jealous because we don't have the things we see.
Let me tell you, if you want a lesson on what's in our base nature, observe a toddler and they will teach you everything that we adults struggle with privately! Ecclesiastes 4:4 talks about how a person's hard work produces envy in other people. The writer here says this reaction reflects our vanity and reflects an unsatisfied spirit. As Christians we already know not to be jealous of the things other people have. However, sometimes those feelings still creep up. Our society, with our social media platforms, exacerbate the problem, as people use these tools to put out a glamorous front to the world. It makes it easier and easier to allow those questions of "What about me?" to creep up.
So what do we do about our basic jealous predisposition? When we have those feelings or thoughts, we should reflect and consider whether we are unsatisfied in some way. Do we have an unmet expectation? Don't focus on the person you see who has aroused those feelings. Instead, look inwardly to understand your feelings and go to God. Tell God about your desires.
Wanting a bigger house or designer clothes like so and so, are thoughts that can reflect jealousy. However, we can turn that around by going to God and allowing him to open our heart to understanding whether our desires are something we truly care about or are things we could live without. I believe the Holy Spirit can make that clear for us. When you realize - hey I don't really need this, you will no longer have a desire for it and you will not be jealous when you see people who have that thing. But, if you do feel a need for it, you are now in the right mindset to say why and talk to God about it. You can ask him to help you attain that goal. Remember God's word in Matthew 7:7-11 says:
"Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened. Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!"
For me, I don't want a huge house. However, I do want a home that is large enough to have more kids, be able to comfortably entertain friends and family, and allow for quiet spaces where we could individually enjoy reflective times without distracting each other. If that desire comes along with granite countertops- even better! (Just kidding!) Looking at my need/want, I can see that I already have some of that and more, and this perspective helps me to not have jealousy when I see how other people live around me.
It's important to note that changing our mindset, is not something that we can do on our own. It can only truly be done by the Holy Spirit. I've been reading the book of Ephesians and in there the Apostle Paul instructs Christians to "put off" their base nature and "put on" a new self which is created in the likeness of God. Paul tells us to be renewed in our minds and filled with the Holy Spirit so that we can live in unity and love and have peace with each other. (Ephesians 4) When our minds are renewed, our thoughts are renewed too. We can stop thinking, "What about me" when we look at the blessings of other people. We can allow ourselves to truly walk in love with the people around us because we are no longer inhibited by jealousy.
Let's do what Paul says and "put off" that base nature that likes to compare our haves and haves nots. Let's "put on" the new nature, which is us being filled with the Holy Spirit and talking to God directly when we feel the troubles of feeling unsatisfied. God wants good things for us and cares about our desires. He will do the work of aligning our desires to His will as long as we stay connected with him! Amen.
👌🏽💜
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